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The Way of Love (For Your Marriage)

Aaron McHugh

In 2016 a few dear friends of ours were getting married, and they asked my wife and me to say a few words at their wedding. Our marriage was recovering from a difficult season, and I struggled with the idea of reading the traditional “Love Chapter” from I Corinthians 13 that is usually recited at weddings. Somehow it felt too polished and missing my shortcomings and failures. I combined four different translations and I wrote this rendition.

Regardless of your faith background, I believe the truths of these ancient words will resonate. You can grab a download copy here. Throw it up on your refrigerator or office wall to remind you of your true north.


The Way of Love

If I speak with you using fancy persuasive words or if I write you love songs that I sing to you under a starlight night, or if I buy you a house with a white picket fence with a new BMW in the garage, but if I don’t have love as my motive, love as my guide, love as the silver thread woven into the fibers of our marriage, then all of my words and actions will make you grow weary like the creaking sound of a rusty gate.

-So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I’m bankrupt without love. I want to learn to love you like this,

-Love never gives up. The Way of Love doesn’t permit the word divorce in our home.

-Love isn’t self-centered. The Way of Love studies and learns the deep desires of your heart.

-Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have. The Way of Love develops daily rituals to remind me to be grateful.

-Love doesn’t strut,

-Love doesn’t have a swelled head.The Way of Love humbly owns how I am unfinished as a person. The Way of Love is to admit that I am under construction and in need of constant renovation. The Way of Love is never to pretend that I’ve got this whole thing figured out.

-Love doesn’t force itself on others,
-Love isn’t always talking about “me first.”The Way of Love is tender and patient waiting with an open hand, not a tight grip.

-Love doesn’t fly off the handle. The Way of Love punctuates every conversation with restraint.

-Love doesn’t keep score of the shortcomings of others. The Way of Love never participates in the battles of blame. The Way of Love grows forgetful together and remains loyal no matter what the cost.

-Even when your spouse blows it, is terrible to be around, is sick, depressed, disappointed, angry, irritating, obnoxious, or temporarily impersonates someone you’ve never met. The Way of Love forms an alliance with God about who He designed your spouse to be, despite how ugly that part of them is right now.

The Way of Love never stops believing the best about each other and always expect the best from each other.

The Way of Love still stands your ground in defending your spouse even when it’s with your best friend, your family or someone who intimidates you. The Way of Love also knows when it is time to let them come to their own defense.

The Way of Love always trusts God’s kind heart and intentions towards you even when life’s road is steep, rocky and full of dead ends.

The Way of Love never looks back but finds a way to keep going to the end.

-The way forward is Love. In the end, Love Wins.


The way of love adapted from 1 corinthians  13:4 by aaron mchugh | Aaronmchugh.com