No Substitute for Real Relationships (not social media)

There is no substitute or alternative to relationships, real human connection and understanding.

Social media can be confused as a substitute or mechanism to create real sustainable relationships.  The “Like” button is not the same as liking a person whom you’d spend an afternoon with.  Yet, I believe our younger brothers and sisters of society are missing this distinction.

The Social media revolution has driven the Age of Acquaintances connecting real people throughout the globe.  But being acquainted is not the same as being known.

I have met many amazing people through social media.  And yet I do not “know” them.  We exchange an email or tweet or even Skype (more human connection).  Being in the presence of another person, in the same room, using your voice (not text) to speak to each other…..now that is entirely different.

Turn off your computer, your phone, your iPad and walk over and have a conversation with a co-worker, a friend, your spouse, your neighbor, the cashier at the car wash.

Be curious.  People have a story to tell a lot of which will never be printed.  Dare to be more human today.

If Your Mom Is Your Only Fan?

I can’t watch auditions for American Idol

Photo by LifeSuperCharger (Creative Commons)

Have you ever sat and watched the auditions for American Idol?

There are thousands of people that step up to the plate and take a swing at a solo singing performance for thirty seconds in front of live judges.  Out of each city’s tour from the mass of men, ten or fifteen surface to be worthy of being selected.

Most don’t have what it takes

Most do not have the skill set, gifting, beauty and grace of voice to continue.  But they arouse enough courage and fortitude to risk rejection to say “at least I tried”.

And there are a few that simply cannot see that even on their best day there is such a wide gap, there is no way they will ever make it.

Their friends and family keep telling them that they should be famous.

The combination is a person with no talent, but unwavering conviction and hope.  I can’t watch it.  It is painful to see it unfold.

Especially long after the rejection and tears they are still unable to entertain the possibility that their hope is greater than reality.

What does this have to do with us?

At first, none of us know which group we will be in.

When you start the equivalent of singing in the shower it is too early to tell if it will amount to anything of substance or livelihood.

Hugh MacLeod started doodling at the bar on the back of business cards, now he is smashing it, writing books, selling original art to his tribe.  Hugh’s Book, Evil Plans is a great read.

Leaving the comfort of a career

And then a few friends and family start saying, “@MannyLadis you should leave the comfort of your 15+ year career selling Enterprise Data Center services and start a Cloud desktop computing company.”

@MannyLadis is part of a revolution of new Cloud providers off-loading the nonsense of IT desktop management to instead deliver the same applications without all of the headaches.

When you start shipping it, dreaming about it, going for it, you don’t know which group you’ll be in.

  1. Selected to play
  2. Tried, but does not have what it takes
  3. Shouldn’t have even tried

You won’t know at first.

You should try and gather up the self-confidence and courage to go for it.

You should listen to solicited feedback.

You should ignore a lot of what you hear.

And if your mom’s your only fan, that might be an indication that you should rethink your plan.

1% talk back

In Talk Radio less than 1% of listeners talk back.  Translated, only 1% of your listeners will actually pick up the phone and engage in the dialogue with the show host.  99% just sit back and enjoy the content but do not contribute or spar with the talk show host.

That same reality is present for a writer, a musician, or your art, your new idea, your special sauce.

With any art, it is important to consider your motives first.  Like a talk show host, if you are providing something meaningful and relevant the 1% is still a small sampling of the impact or result.

So you better deeply believe in what you are doing more than you need to hear from your audience.

Audience participation and feedback are not always an accurate reflection of the value of your contribution or impact.

Even if you hear crickets chirping, don’t give up.

And, make sure you don’t disregard the ratings either.

What other people say

What other people say is more important that what you say.

Third party endorsements are more powerful than anything you can say about yourself, your product or your service.

This is nothing new.

People talk, tweet, text, and blog peer-to-peer.

The phone book (who uses that anyway?) is a wall of flat text.

A Google search about your business is sorted based on –most popular.

The world today does not tolerate directories.

True honesty happens when you are not in the room.

Yelp works because the restaurant owner is not in charge of what is being said.

What is being said about your craft, service, art, impact, influence, ideas, timeliness, ethics, quality…..when you are not around?

Eject Button

Photo by Chris Phillips (Creative Commons)

Know when to push the eject button.

I’m pushing the button today.

Sometimes it is the better path of wisdom.

It beats dying in the rubble of trying to keep flying the current failing mission.

Who are you? Do you know?

It is such an imperative question to ask.  And your first answer will not be entirely accurate.

It is so difficult to see your own skills, talents, and uniqueness clearly.  We are aware of those collections of amazing elements that make us “You”.  But we lack the intricacy of insight required to fully comprehend our bigness, our own recipe that makes up our “special sauce”.

We need trusted advisers to assist us in crafting the laser precision summary of “Who am I?”

Don’t misunderstand me.  I know who I am at a macro level.  But when I start tracking down to a micro level, I need some help.

This was my quest beginning in 2011.  I needed to be able to communicate “Who am I?  What do I make, invent, and pioneer? Why is it important?  Am I any good at it?

Those questions drove me to ask questions of the few people I respected the most in the space of Work.  And the prerequisite was I had to trust their belief and heart for me.  That cocktail combination of respect for them and trust in their intentions for me was powerful.

I asked those trusted advisers to get out their red ink pen and start lighting up my first cut answers to these questions.  There was more red than black.  And it was beautiful.

They helped me extract from the marrow of my life “Who I am.”  Notice it was no longer a question.  A period was inserted and it became a statement.

I am under renovation and always improving, inventing, editing and dreaming.

I am becoming dangerously clear on who I am, what I do and why it matters.

Start asking the question.  It will disrupt the trajectory of your life.

@ Connecting and inventing

As you hear crickets chirp from me, here is who I’ve been connecting with and projects I’m working on….

@TierraPlan  building optimization software together

@sivers getting introduced

@clayhebert comparing notes

@rrsheff training for Ironman Triathlon

@TeamCora adding insights

and that’s just the warm up.



Type A-The Solution

So some guy, some Type A, must have decided that he would combat his trajectory towards a heart attack by inventing one of these.

The Treadmill Workstation.

I am not sure if this is genius or if it is the image that the rest of the world uses for their version of anti-motivational posters.  It might say “Don’t move to America.”

I hope you enjoy the wiki article below.

Type A & B Personality

History

Type A personality behavior was first described as a potential risk factor for heart disease in the 1950s by cardiologists Meyer Friedman and Mike Jordan. After a ten-year study of healthy men between the ages of 35 and 59, Friedman and Rosenman estimated that Type A behavior doubles the risk of coronary heart disease in otherwise healthy individuals.

Type A

The theory describes a Type A individual as ambitious, aggressive, business-like, controlling, highly competitive, impatient, preoccupied with his or her status, time-conscious, arrogant and tightly-wound. People with Type A personalities are often high-achieving “workaholics” who multi-task, push themselves with deadlines, and hate both delays and ambivalence.

Wikipedia-source

Automation is not a shortcut to solve problems

Are you aware that Automation can be short for more problems?

Automating…..

  • What is already broken or not working well will create a bigger mess.
  • Will give you more insight into problems that you didn’t know exist.
  • Will expose your weaknesses in people, systems, and processes.

When we insist that adding or increasing automation EASILY equals success, you are kidding yourself.

Automate| Improve|

Automate| Improve|

Automate| Improve|

Automate| Improve|

Automation is a process not a switch.

It’s more like an old HAM Radio.  You have to turn a few dials to sharpen the signal.  Don’t give up. Turn the knob instead.

The People are the Plan

Today, I met with an owner of a Convenience Store company who has been at the helm, or standing nearby while his son steers, for over 51 years. And when asked the question, “What do you care most about in the business today?” His answer?  ”The People”.

Yep. I heard it correctly. I asked again. “You mean, more than the new location that is under-performing or the new environmental regulation that may cost you millions, you care about The People?”

A simple, subtle, bashful ”Yes”.

He spent the morning with the three new hires. Their first day was today and he knew each of their names, and what position they are embarking on.  And whose shoes they were trying to fill.

His business plan for success for over 51 years when asked, “Has it always been about people?”  His answer “Well here is the proof. On my right, she’s been here for 17 years and on my right he has been here for 31 years”.

Smashing powerful! Just smashing.

Who believes today that “The People” are the plan?

With today’s technology, today’s pace, today’s low interest rates, today’s outsourcing?

Good people are irreplaceable. Good people make you look like a genius. Good people will make you wealthier than you can imagine, in your life and maybe even your bank account.

Don’t just slap it into your company mission statement. Don’t put it in your slides for the investors to see, “Why our team is worth investing in?”

Live it.  The People are the plan.  

*originally published Aug 2011, but am republishing.  Blog was in draft mode then.