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Unravel What the World Has Taught You

Madness or Brilliance?
Madness or Brilliance?

Do you remember watching the 1996 movie Jerry Maguire ?

Remember Tom Cruise playing the slick sports agent whose career implodes in a single afternoon?

In the first three minutes of the movie we get the Cliffs Notes of his life. He has spent years working for the most successful sports management company of his day. He is fierce and suave, and he is dying inside.

In his words, he had become “another shark in a suit.”

One night, just before his corporate conference, he finds himself at a moral crossroads, a point of breakthrough. During his wrestling—his epiphany—he does headstands in his hotel room and unravels what he had previously learned about the world.

He starts writing a mission statement

He is not merely writing a memo, he realizes, but a mission statement. A suggestion for the future. In it, he advocates a provocative concept to his coworkers: charge less money, take on fewer clients, and give more personal attention. In the next scene we see him running 110 bound copies of his manifesto, title page and all, and stuffing them one by one into his colleagues’ in-boxes.

He calls it “The Things We Think and Do Not Say: The Future of Our Business.”

Jerry Maguire is alive again.

His mission statement makes him famous, but for all the wrong reasons.

His peers smile as they make eye contact from across the conference room while making sure not to stand close enough to catch the career-suicide bug that they knew had surely infected him.

Soon Jerry is fired and leaves the office with his mission statement in one hand and the goldfish, his only heretic recruit, in the other.

OK. To be fair, the cute secretary comes with him, as well. She can’t resist a man of principle.

What does Jerry Maguire have to do with me? 

Everything. What you are reading now is a mission statement. Not merely a memo, but a suggestion for the future. You awoke to your in-box stuffed full of my sweat-stained declaration of independence.

This is a manifesto. A coup d’état. A sudden illegal overthrow.

I am inviting you to unravel what the world has taught you about your work, your career, and your future.   

I may end up being the lonely guy holding a goldfish with no one following me. But, like Jerry, I’m willing to run the risk.

I’ve lived too long following the rules and expecting the outcome to match the promises.

It hasn’t worked.

*Expert from eBook: Don’t Quit Your Job. Fire Your Boss.

For your complete free copy download here.

Your Boss, Your Biggest Customer & Your Future

If you believe that your boss, your factory, your pension, or your biggest customer is your only hope for a prosperous tomorrow, then you will do anything to protect those eggs in that lone basket.

You will resign your will, your opinions, your creativity and your passion in trade for self-preservation.

The more you feel like a victim who is subject to the whims of the company or the policies of leadership, the more you feel like a slave to your mortgage payment, the more you will shrink back and keep signing the unwritten contract.

Two choices will always remain:

  1. How will you choose to respond?
  2. How will you choose to interpret your experiences?

You have the power to transform your workplace experience solely based on your interpretations and reactions. Tomorrow, when you return to your office, you can have a brand new job and a new arrangement for your future. But only if you are willing to recalibrate what you believe.

*Expert from Don’t Quit Your Job. Fire Your Boss.  

For your complete free copy download here.

Kill the Giant Squids & Dominate the World

WORLD DOMINATION SUMMIT 2013

When I told Leith, my wife, about the event a few months ago her reaction was “What in the world is that?”

It is an event focused on living a life you want to live vs. accidentally living a life you think you should.

Chris Guillebeau author, world traveler, adventurer and entrepreneur was the gracious host of 3000 fellow world changers.  The WDS team curated an unbelievable lineup of speakers, break out sessions, a mobile app for keeping track of people you met, opening party with a marching band at the Portland Zoo, and on and on.

One ingredient to change the world

If you’ve ever had an idea, a dream, a vision or hope of making something, sharing something, creating something, organizing something then you my friend should have a seat at next year’s WDS 2014.

Changing the world we live in only takes one ingredient,
offering our full self.

I’ve spent many years hiding myself, taking the back seat, waiting for permission, editing the full story and the world was only receiving a faint glimmer of the whole me.

Invitation to offer yourself

Being around 2999 other people who share a similar desire releases an invitation within me.  When you witness another human being offer their truest self it unlocks something in each of us and we are invited to do the same.

The world was flat

I met a guy named Bo that is going to sail around the world by himself.

  • He’s not a record holding sailor.
  • He’s not independently wealthy.
  • Until a few months ago he didn’t even own a sailboat.

There was a time when people would have told Bo,

“Even if you make it past the man-eating squid,
you’re going to sail off the edge of the world and die”
.

Today, the only real obstacles to sailing around the world or dominating your little swatch of the planet are:

The thoughts in our head

I can’t do this.  It’s not going to work.  What will people think?

We all entertain these voices that keep us believing that there is a man-eating squid ready to devour us if we continue down this ridiculous path that we dream about following.

The daring and barely brave go ahead anyway.

Consistently showing up and doing the work

80% is simply showing up faithfully and chipping away at the project, task, or dream.

Bo’s going for it. He bought his sailboat, untied the bow and is shoving off towards the sunset.

What’s our excuse for not leaving the dock?

I need your help!

I’m attempting to expand my patch of world domination to ChangeThis.com.

This is a Manifesto network that distributes ideas that change minds.

My eBook, Don’t Quit Your Job. Fire Your boss is being voted on for acceptance to their network and I have three days left.

Would you be willing to take three seconds to click on the button (bottom of the page) that says “Yes Write this Manifesto”-click here.

Why We Should Avoid the Sea of Same?

Being the same is easier than creating something unique.

Being the same is less risky than paddling out away from the sharks to see what the blue ocean holds.

Being the same is safer because you know people will buy your (fill in the blank).

Be a heretic instead.

Don’t succumb to copying the guy next to you.

Find your voice.

Find your story.

Create your own special sauce recipe.

The risk is that you may actually create something of lasting value.

The Sea of Same as my friend Mike Field calls it is filled with microscopic differences from one offer to the next.

Don’t be like them.

You’re better than that.

Redefining Success: Straddle the Fence of Work & Family

Redefining Success: Straddle the Fence of Work & Family

I find it difficult to always be in balance.

Usually work, life or play is taking up more than their fair share of the allotted time between sunrises and sunset.

The biggest tug-of-war is between family and work.

The older I get the more I see how driven we are as a nation to “succeed”.

The irony of that quest is that the definition is largely driven from deep within us.

We each define and adapt our own definition of success.  There are of course external definitions that influence our belief system.

How your neighbor or your brother or your co-worker defines success likely does not align like a dovetail joint with your version.

Success is making a ton of money

I had dinner with a guy a few months ago and his definition went like this.

“I care about making money”.

He and his family have aligned around the idea that Dad goes to work and mom cares for the kids.

In his early forties he believes that once he banks his millions he will be able to nestle into a life long practice of investing in his family.

The truth is he already has a million dollars or more socked away, but that first million or two was not enough.

He kisses his kids and boards his next flight to go fight in foreign wars on foreign lands.

Will his theory work?

Maybe he’s right?

Can we maintain hyper focus on our work for days, weeks, months, years and decades and then make a switch to our family later?

My experience says no.

Time is not a renewable commodity.

Relationships are fragile and largely dependent upon continual deposits over time.

In home mortgage terms, you can’t make a balloon payment once per year.

Healthy relationships simply don’t tolerate annual airdrop care packages.

What if family always comes first?

I have other friends who are so engaged with their family it is worth taking note.

They attend every one of their kid’s practices, volunteer in their kid’s classroom and help make magical birthday parties a reality.

Wow.

I’m not just talking about women here.  I mean I have guy friends who show up and make their kid’s lives amazing.

I’ve tried to take a few cues from their example.

There is a balance

I’ve seen plenty of people who allow the pendulum to swing so far towards this direction that their families lack sustainable provision.

Lot’s of time invested and great relationships but challenges arise when it comes time to send your kids to the dentist to get a cavity filled.

Physical presence is not enough

I’ve learned that being fully present is the single best gift you can offer your family, co-workers, employees, friends or acquaintances.

I wanted to believe for years that if you were there in physical presence that was enough or at least good enough.

The reality is that physical presence is useless if we are not also emotionally present.

The crux then becomes how do we maintain both physical and emotional engagement in both worlds?

How do we straddle the fence?

How do you afford to take your kid to the dentist and be emotionally engaged in his/her life?

How do you afford to go on a nice vacation with your wife and be around on a Thursday evening to enjoy a glass of wine on the deck?

Straddling the fence of these two invitations is difficult.

I’ve met very few people who actually have navigated the fence straddling very well.

I have met thousands of people who have a lot of money.

I have met many fewer who have a lot of money and simultaneously have great relationships with their children, wife and friends.

Which side of the fence do you want to be on?

How precarious might your journey be if you attempt to occupy positions of influence on both sides of the fence?

Be thoughtful.

Walk on purpose.

Colorado Springs Wildfire: Inventorying What You Love

Colorado Springs Wildfire: Three miles from my house

Colorado Springs Wildfire 2013

There is a wildfire burning three miles from my house right now.

I took this picture yesterday at around 1 pm.  This area of our city is called Black Forest.  There are hundreds of gigantic homes on two to five acre lots.  We have friends who live in these neighborhoods and all of them are evacuated and waiting to hear if their homes are still standing.

My family and I are on voluntary evacuation as we directly border the mandatory evacuation area.

We went room to room with our iPhone capturing video of our belongings in case we need to provide proof to our insurance company.

I think our home should be fine.  Last year the Waldo Canyon Fire jumped the ridge and traveled three miles in under an hour.

So we are not entirely out of the woods just yet.  More coverage on the Black Forest Fire.

Four hours after the fire began

Inventorying what you love

It is very telling when each person in your family has to go through their personal belongings and determine what they can’t live without.

We have gone through this drill two summers in a row.

The list ends up being much smaller than you would think.

Since we have three cars now with a teenage driver, we could afford to be more liberal in our limits.

Before I tell you what did make the cut, I’ll let you in on what didn’t.

Everything that can be purchased in a store was shrugged off as not imperative.  TV’s, Computers, furniture, clothes, kitchen appliances, all of those things scored low on the lover meter.

In some ways these things even feel heavy.  We’ve heard it a hundred times that the stuff we own weighs us down.  When inventorying our home, 95% was stuff we could live without.

To give you the full story, we lost our twelve-year-old daughter two and half years ago.  Hadley Rae McHugh’s life changed us forever including what we know we can’t live without.

[tentblogger-youtube HYBAke3UnXo ]

What did we bring with us?

We each packed a suitcase of clothes, my laptop, precious keep sakes, a couple of comforts like pillows and stuffed animals.

My son is the biggest minimalist, so his suitcase was filled with his favorite DVD’s, a few clothes and Hadley’s oxygen tube that was removed from her before she passed.

My daughter is the pack rat so she grabbed as much as we would allow including 74 lip-glosses and eye masks.

My wife loves here Lulu Lemon wear, wedding album, photos and a few of my daughter Hadley’s things.
In some ways she would like a new beginning.

I grabbed a stack of cards and letters that my family has given me over the years.  I pulled the family hard drive, my two bibles, a couple of journals and a bunch of gear.  The gear can be replaced but my thinking was “I don’t want to wait two months for an insurance check and not be able to fish, ride, climb, hike, swim.”

Defining wealth by what really matters

It turns out that wealth in our family is defined more by who we are with (each other), a few memories that we want to retain and a few comforts if we were living on friend’s couches for a bit.

Our actions reveal what we believe.  I am proud to say that our family defines wealth largely by the things that cannot be purchased.  Wealth is a feeling and a belief more than a balance of our checkbook.  Some of the wealthiest (financial) people I know are displaced from their homes struggling with the same question.

“What makes me wealthy?”

I wonder how these exercises of inventorying our things will influence how we live our future?

Job Seeker Take Some Free Advice

(Photo by SaveMoney Creative Commons)

Standing out from the crowd really isn’t that difficult.

Most people just don’t seem to give it much thought.  Or they would choose differently.

Job seekers, please accept some free advice.

99% of your competitors will not do these things.

Fundamentals

  1. Act like a Pro and you will be treated and recruited like one.
  2. Don’t misspell the person’s name that you are interviewing with.
  3. Run spell check on all written communications.
  4. Create a digital portfolio, not just a resume.
  5. Don’t rant on your Facebook page and expect your prospective employer not to read it.
  6. Create a LinkedIn profile now.  If you have one, constantly update it even if you are not changing jobs.
  7. Ask your peers, co-workers, customers and bosses for LinkedIn endorsements.  Remind them you are just keeping your profile current.
  8. Create an email signature (even if it is Gmail).

Format for your email signature

  • Name
  • Title (the job you want to be hired for or what you bring to the table)
  • Phone
  • Email
  • LinkedIn profile or digital presence.  Facebook is not what a company is looking for.

Best Practices

  • Go to Vista Print and create a free pack of personal business cards.
  • If your references are discussed, then provide them immediately.
  • Prepare a separate document for references.  Do not email them typed into an email.
  • Convert all word docs into Adobe PDF.

After the interview

  • Write a hand written thank you note and mail to each person you met with.
  • Provide evidence and proof of what you’ve accomplished.

You will be surprised how few people actually do any of these things.  

But you’re not like them.

Good luck.

Why Our Nanosecond Love Affairs Won’t Last?

We live in a world where time is now measured in nanoseconds.

Every few nanoseconds, a new alert pops up on our screen and our attention is diverted to this nanosecond’s interruption.

We invite the interruption.

Somebody follows us, somebody likes our picture or somebody favorites our Yelp post from that cool hipster restaurant we visited last week.

It’s easy to get some love, but it has never been more difficult to maintain the love.

Nanosecond love affairs

Think of it.

How many times do we find a new band, a song, a blog writer, or news article and we offer all our love.

Then a nanosecond later we are onto our next love affair.

There is an unending stream of new (fill in the blank) begging for our attention.

Nanoseconds of fleeting love, then our screen flashes and we move onto our next love affair.

Sustainable

Sustainability should still be the goal.

It’s exhilarating to get “liked” or “followed” right?

Or at least it feels like a nice gesture of confidence or appreciation.

Competing for attention has never been more difficult.

Simultaneously the opportunity for reach has never been greater.

How will we leverage the greatest opportunity in history (reach) with the problematic challenge of unending choice every nanosecond?

How will we find a few sustainable lovers?

How to Love People, Pick Yourself and Watch Less TV

Writing on the plane  

Writing a blog will change your life.

Here is my list on why you should write a blog.

1) Pick yourself

Why wait to be noticed, chosen, picked, plucked, watched, captured or picked up?

Instead go for broke.

They are tough odds to attempt to gain attention from people when they have 160 million other blogs to choose from.

My theory is it might as well be you that get’s picked.  Start with picking yourself.

2) You’ll watch less television

I am all for mindless moments of life, yet I can only do so much of it.  Writing a blog will reduce your television vegetative state.  When you download the calendar scheduler for WordPress you will quickly feel the Type A responsibility to not be a slacker and get working on your next post.

3) You’ll meet people you would never meet

I love meeting new people.  It is absolutely amazing who you will meet, the context in which you will meet them and how you will mutually help each other.

Check out our friends Carter and Brooke who just got engaged.  His whole engagement video was shot with a guy who he met on Instagram.  People they met through Instagram hosted an engagement party for them in Portland OR.

This video is their story.

Their video was recently featured on the worldwide Instagram community.

Yes I know she is pretty.

CARTER AND BROOKE // THE ENGAGEMENT from Colin Cabalka on Vimeo.

4) You never know where it will lead you

I’ve been hired for consulting gigs, had people stop me at dinner parties, my seventeen year old son thinks I am fairly cool and the future feels brighter.
All because I risk putting words and ideas onto this digital page.

Doing nothing new today will provide you a 100% guarantee that nothing new will happen.

Start risking today and you’ll be surprised how many things you’d think would fail just might work.

You won’t believe who will say “Yes” if you just ask.

Adventure is around the next corner.

Here is a quick list of some of the massively interesting people I have met because of this blog:

Jeff Goins blogs @Goinswriter

Srinivas Rao blogs @ The Skool of Life

Jeremy Stratton blogs @Living Better Stories

Todd Henry blogs @The Accidental Creative

5) You will live with more hope in humanity

People are inherently good, yet any trip to the grocery store or a nasty conference call with a belligerent customer might lead you to believe otherwise.  Writing a blog can evoke other people to share their stories with you.  You will be encouraged by their stories, their dreams and their cool projects.

Today, I had a great conversation with a guy who was sharing my eBook with his fellow co-workers.  They are in the middle of a corporate restructuring and instead of feeling helpless he was offering them encouragement, “You ought to read this”.

Ready to get started?

How to setup a blog in 20 minutes or less-Michael Hyatt’s instructions.

How I Turned a Seven-Hour Layover into Aloha

Anyone who travels for business knows that it is not glamorous. Anyone who says Oh but you get to eat in great restaurants has not traveled for business. Those of us who spend days and months away from home each year know that it wears on you.

We’ve all seen the magazine columns for “Road Warrior” that teach you how to work your abs while sitting in your fuselage seat. On the road it can be difficult to eat healthy, exercise and sleep well.

Recently I found myself at the Philadelphia, PA airport with seven hours before my flight left for Denver and I decided to run an experiment.

The experiment

Could I spend less than $75 ($10 x hour) and actually turn these seven hours into an enjoyable experience?

It’s easy to sit in front of your computer or drink too much.

Instead could I arrive home refreshed, having exercised and eaten well?

Here is my story.

I hope you enjoy and are encouraged to alter your next layover into some Aloha.

Put on some tunes and plug in your headphones

I’ve found that they very first place I have to start is by plugging in my headphones and tuning out the world around me.

Generally I’m pretty sensitive to environmental noise and plugging in allows me to alter my environment.

My buddy Matt Toth taught me this trick.

It is amazing how much this can help improve my mood and upgrade the quality of my input.

Get out the walking shoes

I always travel with running gear.

Even if I think I may only get in 10 minutes on my trip, I still pack them every time.

I’ve been a runner for over twenty years and for me there are few rivals to refresh me like exercise does.

I find it telling that you can find almost anything in an airport but a gym.

You can find casinos, booze galore, food-food-and-more-food, but no gym.

I asked one of the information booth employees “Do you have a gym”.

Her answer was really smart, “No, but if you want to walk all the way to the end of the terminal and back I hear it is a mile”.

Game on.

Headphones in, running shoes on, I walked back and forth end-to-end for an hour.

It was awesome.

I felt like I was getting at least some form of exercise and was able to scout other options for Aloha in the airport terminals.

I think I ended up with somewhere around 3.5 miles.

I wore out my suitcase wheels and have to now repair them, but it was worth it.

Choosing rest and restoration

Interior of a Minute Suites provided by Minute Suites

As I walked up and down the terminal, I passed a massage place, shoeshine booths and a Minute Suites.

I’d heard about these mini-rooms that you could rent for an hour, take a nap, watch some Netflix or just get away from the crowd.
(Read more on Minute Suites –NY Times by Christine Negroni)

As I passed the Minute Suites seven or eight times, I debated through the list of excuses “that’s too expensive” or “you can sleep at the gate”.

I was running an experiment right?

$36 to take a nap for an hour, in private, with no outside noise, in the dark, with clean blankets and pillowcases?

Sold.

It was really a nice break.

I was shown to my private quarters, asked if I needed a wake up call and got the quick orientation on how to run the TV and thermostat.

An hour nap and I was a new man.

Fresh food and wine

I found a nice little wine bar and ordered up a fresh cheese and fruit plate.

Nothing extravagant but I sat underneath a patio furniture umbrella seated around potted plants and trees.

It was almost like I was outside.

By this time, I’m back on email and responding to work needs.

The difference is I've got a shxx eating grin on my face.

What’s your story?

Would love to hear your Road Warrior stories.

Feel free to share your tips in the comment section of this post.

Minute Suites locations

Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta International Airport
Concourse B at Gate B15
(404) 762-7660
Philadelphia International Airport
Terminal A-B Link
(215) 937-1076
Dallas-Fort Worth International Airport
Terminal D at D23
(972) 973-4235
Now Open!

Christine Negroni

Readers-check out Christine’s travel blog www.gohowknowhow.com
She is a career journalist, author and featured in television and magazines.
She has more airline miles under her belt than we might have collectively between us. 

Check out her portfolio. 
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